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  • prequel

    "Top blog/Renato Obeid's World/Today's pick: This rambling weblog is worth reading not so much for its satirical posts but more for its insight into the minutiae of life in Lebanon, including the etiquette of road accidents and how to hire a taxi.” -Jane Perrone, The Guardian

    Tuesday, July 10, 2007  
    I spend half of my life trying to get to sleep and the other half trying to wake up.
    Nonetheless I try to keep busy when I’m awake because I believe that if you don’t ‘'work’’ during the day, you’ll ‘’work’’ at night.
    That is, if you don’t occupy yourself productively during the day it will catch up with you at night when you’re trying to sleep.
    Even then, it’s not a guarantee but at least you know that you did what you have to do and have taken ‘’precautions’’.
    Apart from being good exercise, my walks are a form of insomnia ‘’insurance’’.
    It doesn’t always work, just like insurance doesn’t always work, but it’s reassuring anyway.

    That’s why I classify myself as a “full-time professional insomniac’’
    It’s like a job!
    Eight hours!
    Most people don’t even work for eight hours a day!
    Even when I sleep on the first attempt, the whole procedure still takes at least four hours which makes it a part-time job.
    So I’m doomed to be either a full-time insomniac or, at best, a part-time insomniac but it could be worse, it could be a “3er’’ (taking three attempts to get to sleep) which, when it rarely happens, means that it takes me around twelve hours to get to sleep and is thus a full-time job with overtime.
    Now that’s time-and-a-half!
    I really should get paid for this because it’s not volunteer work.
    Nobody would volunteer to spend up to twelve hours trying to get to sleep so if it’s not volunteer work then technically it ought to be paid work.
    I certainly didn’t volunteer for this.
    If I’m going to be doing volunteer work then I’d much rather it be something like collecting tinned food for poor people.

    1:10 pm

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