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Serious satire
"Humor is a funny way of being serious"
-Thomas Edison
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Copyright© 2001-2010, Renato Obeid
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"Top blog/Renato Obeid's World/Today's pick: This rambling weblog is worth reading not so much for its satirical posts but more for its insight into the minutiae of life in Lebanon, including the etiquette of road accidents and how to hire a taxi.”
-Jane Perrone, The Guardian
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Saturday, March 27, 2004
MY UNCLE WENT TO TUNIS AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY T-SHIRT Arab foreign ministers are one their way home from Tunis empty-handed after the Arab League Summit collapsed before it even started. The ministers, meeting ahead of Monday's opening heads of state session, announced that the summit would be "postponed" for a month because they were unable to reach agreement on several issues. Egypt has offered to hold the summit then at the headquarters of the Arab League in Cairo – although Tunisia isn’t happy with this (what are they going to do with all the t-shirts?). Quite a shame because, as far as spectacles go, the Arab League Summit is the last great summit – what else can match the opulence, the pomp and ceremony, the drama, the intrigue, the squabbles, the boycotts, the walkouts, the clashes etc?. Look at European summits; they just sit around talking about cows! Look at Asian summits; they just sit around talking about computer chips and wearing funny jackets! The Arab League Summit (when and if it's held) is the daddy of all summitry. And who says there isn’t democracy in the Arab world? Look at the summits, twenty two members and twenty three different diverging conflicting opinions. Remember Beirut 2001 when "video killed the Arab Summit"? The Palestinians walked out because they couldn’t watch the video they wanted – the Teletubbies as I recall. The Lebanese hosts wouldn’t allow a live video address from Ramallah by the besieged Palestinian President Yasser Arafat under the pretext that Ariel Sharon could have jammed it and appeared before the summit instead (just like in the superhero movies when the evil villain video addresses stunned conferences through superimposition). Remember last years Doha summit when the Libyans and the Saudis clashed in disagreement over who was the biggest American puppet? "I know you're an American puppet but what am I?" Advice to sailors: to stock up on profanities and insults that not even you are capable of coming up with hang around at the Arab summit. The renatoobeidsworld correspondent at the last summit reported seeing blushing sailors in the public gallery. Basically, it's our version of the Hip-hop Summit or WWE Smackdown. - but with more aggresion and less statesmanship. Given all that plus the fact that nothing is ever acheived at these summits the summit that never was will go down as the greatest summit ever.
P.S: We were never ever told what exactly transpired, what killed the Arab Summit but, reading between the lines of what was said by those attending afterwards , it would appear the Tunisian's were a bit too bossy – thinking that they were the boss of everyone they wanted to impose items on the agenda that did not have majority consensus. I wonder whether this will affect Tunisia's bid for the 2010 Football World Cup – whether the specter of the Tunisians grabbing the ball (highly illegal) and storming off in a sulk will influence the FIFA delegates when they vote.
1:02 pm
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