---------------------------------------------- Serious satire "Humor is a funny way of being serious" -Thomas Edison -------------------- To have your emails deleted please write to me at renatoobeid@hotmail.com -------------------- Copyright© 2001-2010, Renato Obeid


























 
Archives April 2001 May 2001 June 2001 July 2001 August 2001 September 2001 January 2002 February 2002 March 2002 June 2002 July 2002 August 2002 October 2002 November 2002 December 2002 February 2003 March 2003 April 2003 May 2003 June 2003 July 2003 August 2003 September 2003 October 2003 November 2003 December 2003 January 2004 February 2004 March 2004 April 2004 May 2004 June 2004 July 2004 August 2004 September 2004 October 2004 November 2004 December 2004 January 2005 February 2005 March 2005 April 2005 May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 January 2009 April 2009 October 2012
<< current
  • prequel
    •












     
    "Top blog/Renato Obeid's World/Today's pick: This rambling weblog is worth reading not so much for its satirical posts but more for its insight into the minutiae of life in Lebanon, including the etiquette of road accidents and how to hire a taxi.” -Jane Perrone, The Guardian

    renatoobeidsworld
     
    Wednesday, December 25, 2002  
    3.23PM WEDNESDAY 25TH DECEMBER 2002 – CHRISTMAS DAY
    I was just listening to the news on the BBC World Service radio and heard an Israeli government spokesman saying "we have arrested ten suicide bombers".

    3:23 pm

    Thursday, December 05, 2002  
    The first day of eid el fitr – the three-day celebration which commemorates the end of the Muslim holy month of Ramadan.
    Attended the pub quiz at the Shamrock in Beit Meri yesterday, which, by the way, my team won as usual.
    Afterwards, as usual, a handle full of us congregated in the (mainly) gentleman’s club atmosphere that usually prevails there after the quiz.
    Peter Casey was telling us about an American ex-colleague of his who, incidentally, had won the Fattest Ass in the Midwest competition, which is a pretty impressive feat – there’d be no shortage of competition in that country and that part of that country!
    A couple of years ago they were in a remote part of Taiwan and needed to get somewhere and couldn’t read any of the maps or find their way.
    They stopped an old peasant lady on the road who obviously spoke no English and the American was going off at her for not speaking any English.
    Finally they got to a city and a five star hotel, went in and were greeted by the receptionist who spoke to them in perfect English and with a perfect English accent but was obviously a native – “good day gentlemen, how may I help you?”
    The American replied “first of all, we need to find somebody who speaks English here”.
    “I think you’ll find that I do sir”.
    “Really? You speak English”
    At that stage Peter intervened and sorted things out.
    Fat Ass visited Peter here in Lebanon a couple of years ago.
    They took him to see the ancient ruins of Baalbeck – built by the Phoenicians thousands of years ago and completed by the Romans.
    On seeing those ruins he said “geez, those Israelis sure made a mess of this place!”
    Incredulous and bemused Peter said, “they’re ruins”.
    Fat Ass was oblivious to this and continued “God damn Israelis, God damn Jews!”
    Speaking of which, I haven't been to Baalbeck for ages - the last time I went there the checkpoints were Roman!
    Apparently, it’s more Hezbollah checkpoints these days – a foreign friend of mine told me about how she was with a busload of Western tourists who were stopped at a checkpoint in Baalbeck.
    The driver spoke to the people manning the checkpoint and then told the startled passengers that the Hezbollah wanted a word with them.Hezbollah operatives then boarded the bus and proceeded to hand out orange juice and biscuits as part of a charm offensive.
    5:45 pm

     
    This page is powered by Blogger.
    BREAKING NEWS-LOSER ACTUALLY READS RIGHT DOWN TO THE BOTTOM OF THE PAGE OF RENATOOBEIDSWORLD,WORLD FIRST -